As the days go by...

Today Jacob got to meet a couple more members of his family. Until now, he'd only met his parents, his grandma, and a few friends. His Uncle Derek and Grandpa Pops came up today (along with Derek's girlfriend, Allison) and spent some time looking at him and holding him. It was so nice to see them both up here becoming part of his life. Allison brought her crochet supplies and whipped him up an adorable little soft, brown teddy bear hat in a matter of an hour or two. She had already made one and brought it up, but - having never seen Jakey - it was a bit too big. So, now he'll have one for this winter and one for next fall and winter, too!

He had a check-up on Friday and has gained an average amount of weight since his first appointment a little over a week ago. He's back up to his birth weight of 6lbs. 6oz. and has grown an inch already!

We're stumbling through parenting learning as we go. We've encountered diaper rash and just had a recent worry about him possibly being contipated and not knowing what to do about it. :P (Everything's fine now - we think.) I'm trying to stay persistent with working on the breastfeeding issue I mentioned in my last post. I have him "try" for five minutes or so before each bottle, and he's starting to improve a little. He's actually sucking several times before he starts showing signs of frustration and disgust whereas before he would suck maybe once or twice and then scream/cry and push himself away from me. So, fingers crossed that this keeps improving. Besides the fact that breast milk is the most nutritious option for a baby, formula's frickin' expensive! Plus we generally end up wasting some of it each time he eats because he's never consistent with eating the same amount at each feeding. :/

Sleep is a rare commodity, but I think we're finally starting to get used to sleeping when he sleeps... or else we're just starting to get used to LACK of sleep. :P He seems to have a little schedule of own going already. He's been having a last feeding around midnight and then waking up around 4am and again around 7 or 8am. We usually prepare a batch of formula at night and then I'll try breastfeeding for a few minutes in the morning while the bottle heats up.

Jacob delights us every day. He's so adorable and has the most beautiful, hilarious, and endearing expressions... and he definitely lets us know when he's not happy! He hates being laid down unless he's sound asleep and will crack his little eyes open at random apparently to peek at us to make sure we're still holding him and not trying to lay him down in his bassinet before he's ready. His other hatred is having his diaper changed. You'd think we were abusing him from the way he cries and wails when we're trying to clean him up! I'd held out letting him have a pacifier all of this time, but I relented today and let him suck on one during a change. Talk about a 100% difference! Dave used it when he changed him later on and loved how smoothly the task went. The last time I changed him, I did it without the pacifier and he was pretty quiet. I'm sure that could have been because he was half-asleep, though. :P Oh, I almost forgot... he hates having to take a break from feedings to burp, too. I'm not quite sure WHAT to do about that yet. If he doesn't burp, he spits up a lot of his food. I'm sure that's not good for his tummy, and it's definitely not good as far as the money that we spend on the formula.

Anyway...

We're both so in love with him. How can anyone NOT be? :P I'm really not looking forward to going back to work, but I don't see any way around it at the moment. I guess "you gotta do what you gotta do", right?

Welcome to the world, Jacob Matthew!

The day after I wrote my last blog was my last doctor's appointment. At my appointment, the ultrasound tech noted my fluid levels had dropped dramatically again and told us that the doctor would probably want to induce me by the end of the week. After 40 long weeks and tons and tons of "morning sickness", I was VERY glad to hear this. We figured we had a few more days to get some more stuff done around the house before it was time... but that was just wishful thinking. After the ultrasound, we waited for the doctor. She walked in and asked, "So, are you guys ready to have a baby?" She told us to get over to the hospital as soon as we were ready; they would induce me that night. We weren't expecting that in the least. Nervousness and excitement set in, and we drove home calling or texting everyone we could.

My mom met us at the house and drove with us to the hospital. I was induced at 6pm (on January 11th) and was told that they would give me Pitocin at 6 o'clock the next morning to get the contractions going or to help them move along. Dave left shortly afterwards to come home and let the dogs out and to pick up a few things we had left behind. My contractions kicked in around 8:30 or 9. Dave returned around that time, and my mom left for the night. I dealt with the pain of the contractions for about two hours as they intensified more and more. After that long, I couldn't take it anymore and asked for the Stadol. Once the nurse injected that into my IV, I was in heaven and felt nothing... for about an hour. I guess my heart rate and the baby's heart rate dropped during that time, so they couldn't give me any more until things normalized. They finally came back to check about an hour and a half later, but by that time (around 3am)... it was time to start pushing. I squeezed Dave's hand to death to help get through the pain of each contraction until the doctor had me hold onto my legs instead. :P After about an hour of pain and pushing and labored breathing, Jacob Matthew made his entrance into the world.

He was born on January 12th at 4:20am, weighed 6lbs 6oz, and was 19 inches long. Blue eyes, blond/light brown hair. Dave was there through everything and said it was "the most horrifying but the most beautiful thing" he's ever experienced. :P He says he now has a much deeper respect for women (mothers) than he ever did before.

We signed out of the hospital the following day and have been enjoying every minute with our teeny little guy. I had to go out the other day and buy some Preemie-sized outfits because he's just swimming in the Newborn and 0-3month sized clothes that we have. He's SO little! But the pants for the preemie outfits are a little too snug! There's just not a perfect size for 6lb. babies. :/

We had some issues with breastfeeding, and I had to give him formula for a day or two. :( I really hated doing that, but the poor little guy needed nutrition SOMEhow. After seeing how easy it was to get milk from a bottle, though, Jacob hasn't wanted anything to do with breastfeeding. I mean, I guess why "work" for food (use your strength and muscles to suck) when you have access to something that will almost just pour it down your throat with just the tiniest sip? :( I'm pumping as often as I can and supplementing with formula. I'm still trying to get him to breastfeed for a while before giving him his bottle, but it doesn't seem to be working. Hopefully I can get some help from a lactation consultant, but I'm not feeling too confident that he'll get back into the swing of things.

He ended up becoming jaundiced a few days after coming home due to not eating often enough and not eating enough at each feeding. He had to have his bilirubin levels checked three times already (they draw blood from his heels) by his tenth day of life. The levels have finally dropped to a decent level, but they're still not perfect as he's still not eating much compared to how much babies are *supposed* to eat. Hopefully we'll get there soon, though.

He's such a cutie... Dave and I are both so in love with him. It's amazing to think back on my pregnancy and realize that he's HERE now... and to think about what lies ahead over the next twenty years. :P

Today's the Day... But Nothing's Going On

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So today's the day that my little guy was estimated to be here by, but he's still pretty high up. I was scheduled for another ultrasound and check-up on Thursday, but we decided to postpone it due to the snow that came the night before. So, I have it rescheduled for tomorrow afternoon but don't have my hopes up for any better news.

I guess as long as he's healthy, I should be satisfied. I know the doctor'll schedule an induction before the baby's too overdue, but I'm just so tired of waiting and feeling crappy. I'm tired of not being able to eat or drink what I want for fear of the impending heartburn and/or vomitting. I'm tired of feeling congested every morning and not being able to breathe easily. I'm tired of staying around the house for fear that the little guy might decide to come if I stray too far away. I'm tired of missing work and am frustrated knowing that (without any paid maternity leave) my other accumulated paid leave - sick leave, personal leave, etc. - will be gone within three more weeks or so thanks to the two weeks of bedrest that I had to take for my low fluid levels.

Sigh.

I just want this little one to be here already.

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Counting Down the Days

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It's January 1st... and the little guy is still comfy inside my belly. No New Year's Baby or 2009 tax break for us. :P He hasn't dropped yet and probably won't come until close to his estimated due date of January 10th.

I've had two more appointments since my last entry on here. At my last appointment, the doctor checked my cervix and... OUCH! That frickin' HURT! I knew that they did a finger measurement, but I had no idea that he was going to use so much pressure. I swear it felt like he was trying to dig the baby out himself! He didn't give me any kind of a warning that it might hurt or even that there would be pressure until I was already crying out in pain! No efforts to tell me to try to relax and breathe or anything. Hmpf. Nor did he warn me that I might spot a little bit (or for the remainder of the night!) afterwards. I had to do my own "research" on the internet to find out whether or not the whole thing was even remotely normal. Sigh. Well, at least that's over for this week. I'm assuming that they'll be doing that again each time until the baby comes. Hopefully the baby will start dropping and my cervix will soften up so that the check isn't so painful next week! And hopefully the baby arrives on time and not PAST his due date. (Or at least not TOO far past it.)

Aside from that, everything's going alright. I'm STILL getting sick periodically and experiencing heartburn like crazy, but (surprisingly) my fluid levels are up. My blood pressure's normal as is baby's heartbeat, and he's moving around good and doing his "practice breathing". He still doesn't want to show us his face and keeps hiding it with his hands whenever the ultrasound woman tries to get a picture for us. He's been stubborn (shy?) all along, though, so it's really no surprise. It'd just be nice to see a good, clear picture of his face. I guess we'll just have to wait until he's born to truly see him.

I'm starting to get nervous about going into labor. I've read and heard a lot of birth stories, but I know there's really no way to truly be prepared for the intensity of it all. I've always had a pretty high tolerance for pain and am determined to give birth naturally (no epidural or drugs), but I also know that childbirth is a completely different kind of pain than anything I've ever experienced. Everyone says that once your little one is here, you start forgetting all about the pain and just focus on the new life in front of you. I'm sure that's true, but knowing that still doesn't make the pain go away while it's happening! At least I'll have Dave there with me and have my mom around for support, too. I can't imagine going through this alone.

I want my little sunshine here already, but then I'm so nervous about lies ahead. The first few days... the first weeks... the first months... the first year. I have no idea what's going to happen as far as going back to work, Dave finding a job, staying in O'Fallon or moving down to Carbondale, my dad coming back to live in March or April. There's always uncertainty in Life, and there's always increased uncertainty when a new life is on the way... but it seems so much worse with the situation Dave and I are in right now.

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